All I want to do is change the world.
Sometimes I feel like something is wrong with me because I think about that too much. I wrestle with thoughts about my life and future and I worry I may be wasting my life.
I was given a second chance after almost dying from drug addiction. And I want to make it count. So my mind gets preoccupied with thoughts about how to change the world more often than I care to admit.
Especially on Sundays and vacations when I’m not working. When I’m working, I’m fine. I’m focused on the task at hand and “changing the world” is the furthest thing from my mind.
But then Sunday comes. And my mind once again drifts towards the “big picture.”
What am I doing with my life?
Am I on the right path?
Am I focused on the right things?
These thoughts plague my mind and I start to second-guess everything. It’s not healthy, I know. But I feel unable to stop doing it.
However, one thing does help: focus back on the present.
When I think about my wife and my kids I relax some. When I give thanks for the business and life I have now, I relax a little more and I stop worrying about “the big picture” so much.
Then I remember that if I really do want to change the world then I need to first change my world. And to change my world I need to be faithful in the little things. To pursue excellence in everything I do, big and small.
It’s this kind of thinking that helps me get grounded again and to stop freaking out about “wasting my life.”
If you struggle with this then try it out. Focus on the people you love and the projects you have to do now. See if it alleviates some of the stress.